>>Sexuality is complicated. I'm not kidding when I say mine is a tesseract.<<
It certainly is. I don't think mine is on that level of complicated, but it doesn't feel like much of an exaggeration when I say the conditions for me being in the right mood for sex are "once every third blue moon from 6-8pm with pink tights. And oh ya, next time they have to be purple." XD Brains are complicated.
>>Figuring out what you like or don't like, and why, is easier if you have lists of possible things.<<
Lists certainly help, then I don't have to think of things from scratch, and I'm less likely to miss something. Although it can still be tricky when things are conditional. (Hmmm... that "sometimes" box might come in real handy.)
>>Try to cultivate a little willingness to explore things that you aren't sure you'd like, or think you might not like, as long as they're not downright offputting. I've had some surprises, and this seems to be a common experience.<<
I generally like trying new things, though I have to remember not to go into it with too many preconceived notions. Sometimes I can psyche myself out, if I go in expecting not to like something.
>>although once you've tried a variety of things you can often derive patterns (e.g. most people in kink like either "sting" or "thud" pain but fewer like both)<<
I seem to be one of the rarer ones who likes both, though I prefer milder amounts of either, rather than a lot of "sting" or "thud." I have noticed a tendency to avoid anything that is pinchy or scratchy though; those sensation don't really do it for me.
Re: One person’s take...
Date: 2021-02-24 02:22 am (UTC)It certainly is. I don't think mine is on that level of complicated, but it doesn't feel like much of an exaggeration when I say the conditions for me being in the right mood for sex are "once every third blue moon from 6-8pm with pink tights. And oh ya, next time they have to be purple." XD Brains are complicated.
>>Figuring out what you like or don't like, and why, is easier if you have lists of possible things.<<
Lists certainly help, then I don't have to think of things from scratch, and I'm less likely to miss something. Although it can still be tricky when things are conditional. (Hmmm... that "sometimes" box might come in real handy.)
>>Try to cultivate a little willingness to explore things that you aren't sure you'd like, or think you might not like, as long as they're not downright offputting. I've had some surprises, and this seems to be a common experience.<<
I generally like trying new things, though I have to remember not to go into it with too many preconceived notions. Sometimes I can psyche myself out, if I go in expecting not to like something.
>>although once you've tried a variety of things you can often derive patterns (e.g. most people in kink like either "sting" or "thud" pain but fewer like both)<<
I seem to be one of the rarer ones who likes both, though I prefer milder amounts of either, rather than a lot of "sting" or "thud." I have noticed a tendency to avoid anything that is pinchy or scratchy though; those sensation don't really do it for me.