>>In fact, that's one place where I differ vehemently from most people in defining asexuality. They insist that asexuals don't feel any sexual attraction. I say it includes people who are capable of noticing that someone is sexy, but they don't feel driven to act on that.<<
I like this definition. It matches a lot of what I feel.
>>Thus, anyone who doesn't feel strongly driven to copulate and to pair off will experience difficulties in dealing with the mainstream, and their experiences will often match those of other people on the acespec,<<
I often have those difficulties. I'm not sure I've really met enough acespec people to know how my experiences match up.
>>even if there are variations in how acefolk feel. <<
I think this is an important part that I often forget. That I can find orgasms pleasurable, and find people visually appealing, but still be on the ace spectrum, because it *is* a spectrum. For me it really is a lack of compulsion and driving need and desire that makes me think gray-ace fits, rather than a dislike for sexual acts themselves. And sometimes I forget that those feelings are valid, and that I can be all those things, without falsely using the term asexual.
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Re: Yes ...
Date: 2021-02-24 02:09 am (UTC)I like this definition. It matches a lot of what I feel.
>>Thus, anyone who doesn't feel strongly driven to copulate and to pair off will experience difficulties in dealing with the mainstream, and their experiences will often match those of other people on the acespec,<<
I often have those difficulties. I'm not sure I've really met enough acespec people to know how my experiences match up.
>>even if there are variations in how acefolk feel. <<
I think this is an important part that I often forget. That I can find orgasms pleasurable, and find people visually appealing, but still be on the ace spectrum, because it *is* a spectrum. For me it really is a lack of compulsion and driving need and desire that makes me think gray-ace fits, rather than a dislike for sexual acts themselves. And sometimes I forget that those feelings are valid, and that I can be all those things, without falsely using the term asexual.