OK, so I'mma assume here that by "dudes" you mean "cisgender guys".
If a cisgender dude has asked you to "hang out" in private and they have not disclosed being gay or asexual to you, it's been my experience over fortysomething years that yes they are probably looking to hook up.
If a transgender dude has asked you to "hang out", well... they might not necessarily be looking to hook up. Most trans guys I've known aren't pigs - we've been socialized female and had to deal with the male gaze unless we were lucky enough to transition very very young, so we get how it is and don't want to creep women out (if we're interested in women; some of us are gay guys lol). In any case, a trans guy probably won't mind you asking "is this a date?"
In any case, I don't think asking to clarify is a bad idea. Anyone who actually truly wants to be your friend should be able to deal with any awkwardness of that question without a big deal, because yes, not everyone can read people.
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Date: 2021-06-20 12:20 am (UTC)If a cisgender dude has asked you to "hang out" in private and they have not disclosed being gay or asexual to you, it's been my experience over fortysomething years that yes they are probably looking to hook up.
If a transgender dude has asked you to "hang out", well... they might not necessarily be looking to hook up. Most trans guys I've known aren't pigs - we've been socialized female and had to deal with the male gaze unless we were lucky enough to transition very very young, so we get how it is and don't want to creep women out (if we're interested in women; some of us are gay guys lol). In any case, a trans guy probably won't mind you asking "is this a date?"
In any case, I don't think asking to clarify is a bad idea. Anyone who actually truly wants to be your friend should be able to deal with any awkwardness of that question without a big deal, because yes, not everyone can read people.